<Rainbow Heron>

Wednesday, November 05, 2003

IF YOU HAVE NOT SEEN MATRIX REVOLUTIONS, DO NOT READ THIS BLOGPOST!!!

You have been warned.

Blogger lost my masterpiece of a review here (2 hours down the drain, you'd think I'd've c/p'd the whole post just in case like usual too but no. Ergo it's only *half* my fault, some blug's gonna GET IT for this!!!) so here's version 2.0 and MAJORLY chopped-down. Also sorted by both subject and chronology:


Loose Programs & Where's Neo?
Limbo: So Neo's stuck in between the machine world and the real world: in other words, the Matrix. And they have to plug him in to get him out.

Train Man: They didn't use him as much as they could have. No twins this time either. They weren't deleted in Reloaded when the car blew up were they?

Sati: What is the deal with her? We know she's a program without a purpose, but if she's so unimportant, then why is she here, there, and everywhere all the time? And why is it that only now love is being *truly* addressed (yes it came up in Reloaded with the Architect).

Where do all the programs go?: So lemme get this straight: Frenchie keeps old programs for power, Train Man and his subway take said programs into exile, Sati uses subway to get to Oracle, Frenchie wants Oracle's power, Oracle and Frenchie are enemies...Oracle uses Frenchie's "underground railroad" (Train Man's subway) to smuggle exile program for herself. Why does something not add up to me?

The big laugh of the movie: Was the predictible thing that happened anyway when Neo attempted to follow the subway on the track and only ended up right in the same place he was a moment ago. Predictable (especially since the camera didn't move) but we got the picture. What happened to that other piece of luggage of Sati's which Neo attempted to carry aboard for them anyway?

Seraph's Call: Seraph (is it short for Seraphim?) calls up to get Morpheus & Trinity to see Oracle. In Reloaded, the message was delivered. Why so much closer to Person-to-Person all of a sudden?

Visiting Hours: Morpheus & Trinity visit Oracle to learn how to free Neo. Niobe saw Oracle to learn that she gets to help Neo (but we don't see it). Neo decides to up and goto Oracle by himself. Busy gal. At least we get to see the kitchen again.

Dancing on the Ceiling: FINALLY! SOMEONE WALKS ON THE CEILING!!! It's about time! Why couldn't it have lasted longer? <sigh> That battle had the same feel as the lobby skirmish in the first movie (Neo & Trinity going to save Morpheus), probably because of the columns and close quarters, but didn't last nearly as long.

Dressed to the Nines: First it's "three ships, three objectives". Then it's Trinity & Morpheus & Seraph going into the mosh place (they mosh in all 3 movies- ya notice?) to see Frenchie again. And then you have 3 people pointing guns at the 3 of them when Trinity's got a gun pointed at Frenchie. There's also 3 sets of 3 arches/sewer portholes in the Council chamber. Enough nines for ya? :-)

The Eyes of the Oracle: Frenchie wants them but why? More power? Smith gets them when he infects her, and Neo supposedly has them in Reloaded but no nightmares this time, and Smith can't see beyond the choices he doesn't understand. He doesn't make them after all. :-)

Seraph & Sati: are cornered by Smith an yet the only thing Smith does to them is say "hello again" and sound like a child predator when he calls Sati the "Last Exile". No fight? No attempt at deletion? We never even saw this other time when Seraph supposedly beat Smith and why didn't Seraph use a key to try to get them out of the building this time? PLUS if Oracle's in exile, why'd she go home? Wouldn't they find her?

Oracle Smith: So Oracle allows herself to become infected. Why? And why wasn't she deleted like Neo did when Smith was finally defeated? Did she replicate herself just then and Smith infected *that*?


The Banes of Existence & Going Downtown
"Two ships, two directions": Two now instead of three, and yet they do find the third ship, jumpstart it (or at the very least attempt to), but don't use it. I'm confused here.

Bane Smith: He coulda been used SO much more, but all he seems to do is use an EMP early (which we never saw), kill one human onscreen, show Neo that Smith can infect people, blind Neo, and "go psychotic". Why they didn't figure he was psychotic when they interrogated him?

"Maybe it was self-inflicted": This guy does THE BEST impression of Agent Smith without actually being Agent Smith! Well done!

Kung Fu in the real world: You knew it had to happen at some point.

Blinded to the truth: Bane Smith blinds Neo during their struggle and it also takes forever for the light to go on in Neo's head that Bane is infected with Smith. You'd think the "Mr. Anderson" cracks woulda been the giveaway. If nothing else, no one in Zion calls him that.

Neo's "Sight Beyond Sight": We finally see Neo follow the coding thru the hardlines. We also finally see Neo seeing the code in the real world, but why does it look like fire? (5 pts for title's reference)

Endless Fields: Neo & Trinity see them. They're at the enterance/exit to the sewer and if you follow the power lines from them, you go right into the city. What, no one guards these fields?

Balrog?: Those bomb-ridden machines guarding the perimeter of the machine city look like the heads/faces of Balrogs.

Use the Force Neo: Like the Squiddies at the end of Reloaded, Neo can stop some of the Squiddies as they near the city, but because this is a new power, he can't stop them all. Still cool to see tho.

Sun Moon Stars: Finally, humans see the sun, the moon, a blue sky, and no one lives to talk about it.

Crash landing: Niobe's ship crashes into Zion and Trinity's ship crashes into the machine city. Difference is the crash itself and what happens when it does.

I knew someone was going to die: I just figured it'd be Trinity & Morpheus. I figured it'd be Neo about 20 mintues before he did. But it was "inevitable". :-D Btw, Morpheus lives.

"She is going to die and there is nothing you can do to stop it": And she did die.

DIE ALREADY!: You know the Introduction From Hell and the Revelation From Hell? This was the Death Scene From Hell. I heard snickers in the theater while Trinity was dying. We're talking Shakespeare-length here. Thankfully, she didn't recite any Shakespeare, altho you certainly got the feeling she might. I hated to think this, but after awhile, I was about to snicker too. Tie for longest Scene From Hell I've seen in a theater is with the Revelation Scene From Hell in "Down With Love". And speaking of things from Hell...

Trailers From Hell: 15 minutes worth of trailers before the show. New record.

More Hell Hell: All that code that looks like fire as Neo's walking blind towards the Source...need I say more? Why *fire*? Oh wait, lemme guess, symbolism right?


Going Home & The Battle of Zion
Crazy women drivers: When someoene says "you can't do that", you know someone's either going to do it or has already done it. Not only that, but when they do it (again) it's the same person. AND if they've done it before and you didn't see it, you get to see it now and BOY DO YOU GET TO SEE IT!

"Hold onto your lunch boys": Niobe can DRIVE!!!

Morpheus & Niobe: C'mon, you *knew* Morpheus was gonna co-pilot! I bet they get back together after that. :-)

"Here they come": 3 Star Wars Battles in one and all are surpassed! "Here they come" after rescuing Leia from Death Star I, the trench battle at Death Star I, and Lando flying the Falcon thru Death Star II. GL paved the way for this battle and this battle surpasses it! I'd hate to play it as a video game as it would be too fast for me...that is, if it's done and it probably should be if it isn't already; don't have the Enter The Matrix game so I wouldn't know...

"She's got a big ass": Yes the ship certainly does. It takes more hits and bounces around more than most other movies would do (that's why this isn't most movies and in fact better than some), but it still survives until Zion. I did say *until* there...

Strobe Lights: Damn. Chicago had them directly into the camera and for that it'll be a looooong time before I can brave that. This one certainly had a heck of a lot of strobing too (worst was the Neo/Bane Smith fight) but I can brave this again. No seizures so far.

"If we're about to die anyway, I'd rather die fighting": So they took a cue from The Neverending Story too eh? ;-) Okay so they said it differently, but it's still the same general gist. And yes that quote did pop into my mind immediately after the line in Revolutions.

Synchronized Squiddie: You can do that underwater but it's impossible in midair- cool as heck to see tho! WOWIE WOOHOO!!!! You knew Squiddie was bad *before*...man you ain't seen nothin' yet!!!

Drills: DAMN! WOWIE! Those things are hard to kill!!!

The Battle Itself: TERMINATOR 2- EAT YOUR HEART OUT! There was a Terminator 2 feel to the camera colors, but this beats it to a pulp!

Big-ass robot guns: I like how they have to be reloaded (npi) during the battle. Nice to finally see that not all big-ass guns have an unlimited supply of bullets. :-)

That's gonna leave a mark...: We finally see what happens when a Squiddie does meet a human. Gorey but not nearly as bad as it coulda been, but still look away if you're nervous.

"It's using the plumbing": Yes Zee, I'd probably stay behind and make shells too, but I ain't crazy enough to stick around after making them. But that's just me. I saw a few brief minutes of Alien where Weaver's character (Ripley is it?) is going thru pipes to get away and this reminded me of that. How did those 2 women *not* get spotted when they were in plain sight tho? Didn't get spotted until they missed the perfect shot...dern last-second Squiddies...but then again, missing it gave it a more dramatic effect don'tcha think? ;-)

Lockout: Predictable and the way she (Zee) finds out about helping to open the lock seems an afterthought and the way that kid who was slobbering all over Neo in Reloaded (yes that sounded wrong- shut up) was the one to open it. He said he was doing it for Neo (corny) but Neo wasn't there (ha-ha!).

No EMP: Okay this gets me: the ships have EMPs but Zion doesn't. Lock wants Niobe's ship back home so they can use the EMP to knock out all the sentiels, but Lock also wants them to wait to use it so he can power down all his (Zion's) own equipment so they don't blow. Oh yeah, like they can give that message to Niobe while she's navigating thru that mechanical shaftthingy AND have time to power down AND win the battle AND have it be practical AND have it work...

Reboot: ...and of course when it doesn't, Lock gets pissed (dummy- you can't have it both ways), but no matter, we can reboot some of our stuff. Hmm...if Zion can reboot some of its stuff (like the lights) after an EMP discharge, can Squiddies to that too? I reckon they could since they're more sophisticated than what Zion's been able to scrape together...but no such luck this time I guess.

What, no Gridlock?: From the way Commander Lock was talking, the final stand in the "temple" causing the machines to be put in a bottleneck sounded like it was really gonna happen and we'd get to see it. No such luck. Drats!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THAT WOULDA BEEN SO COOL!!! And why? ...

"Neo's fighting for us": ... You knew Neo would do something to stop the Zion machines, but not due to them waiting for orders as to whether or not Neo beat Smith. And since when does beating Smith end the war (see later)? Someone please start playing a game of poker or tap your foot or SOMETHING! We're all just waiting around here doing nothing! No, you just see Morpheus put down his gun and watch the rest of the curious humans creep out of their hide-a-holes when the machines literally sit down and cross their arms (excuse me, tentacles) to wait. Woulda been better if they all stopped to twiddle their thumbs in the middle of a bottleneck battle...


The Source
"All I have to say": Neo keeps it short & simple. But why didn't the machines already figure that Smith was beyond their control? And if they did, why didn't they stop him before? They coulda but NOOOOOOOOOOOO Neo's gotta do it. Spikehead even says that they "don't need [him]".

Spikehead: How does this "satan"-faced machine with Squiddies for the [humanlike] face (deep voice to boot- npi) know that Neo's coming? Coulda put up more of a fight.

Virus Protection?: The machines don't seem particularly worried about Smith taking over the machine world like Zion. Spikehead just asks Neo about "what happens if you fail?"/"I won't." I know machines don't have emotions, but they coulda at least talked about it a bit more. Plus you don't really see where Smith's about to take over the machine world, just that he's been infecting people and Agents and then going straight after Neo. Where's the threat?

Snakes: Neo has to get plugged back into the Matrix in order to fight Smith. Full job too with all the plugs and stuff. The plugs act like snakes.

Immediate Showdown: Neo goes immediately from the plugs to the final showdown. What? You don't have to look for him? If the machines can find Smith that fast, they can deal with him that fast.

The Final Showdown: 1000s of Smiths stand by as Neo & Smith crack their knuckes again and duke it out. It's not the Burly Brawl and maybe the only 2 bullet times in the whole film occur here.

Superman Kung-Fu in Midair: Nothing like that in cinema until now. Coulda blown me away more tho. Look for those hydrobomb explosions tho! TOO COOL! And you can only see them in full effect on the big screen!

Oscar Smith: I wanna see this guy win an Oscar for something Smith-related even if it's just for having the best angst-ridden facial expression! I bet he's tired of all that "smiling" now. :-D

Well, spit on you: Bane Smith spits blood during the Neo/Bane battle. Neo spits blood during the final showdown.

Questioning existence...the "why?": Usually these kinds of circumstances can get pretty corny but instead Smith had some good lines (excellent execution too!) but ultimately this gets into the weird existential bs stuff I won't go into. These questions, unlike other films however, don't get answered. Both fortunately and unfortunately, they're left open to interpretation. Let the games begin...<::cringes::>

"Because I choose to": "It is not our abilities who determine who we are, but our choices". Okay no more Harry Potter quotes :-) But they're still on the same page here.

Inevitability: The way to defeat Smith is to become Smith. Neo lets Smith infect him. Smith lets out his Maniacal Laughter (and boy does he!!!). The Source/Spikehead does something to Neo and Smith gets destroyed. All of him. It kills Neo, but why didn't Oracle get destroyed too?

"It is done": Spikehead says it and Neo's all sprawled out crosslike. Don't even get me started...just don't even think about getting me started on this. Neo even gets delievered back to the Source on a hearse of sorts.


The End?
Alice?: WHAT?! No Alice character? How about Dorothy? As many references to both that popped up in the first two films, nothing whatsoever in Revolustions. The closest things here are the 1000s of shattering windows during the final showdown (breaking the looking-glass?) and the name of Mary Alice who is the actress who played Oracle (since the original, Gloria Foster died during filming).

Dinah? Here kitty kitty? Dead Neo's body is carried into the Source on a hearse (oh PUH-LEASE!) and we assume that whever code the Architect said Neo was carrying gets delievered (what was all that malarchy again? Still don't get it...). Immediately, code appears and forms into a black cat as the street where Smith was (no I don't "like what [you] did with the place" ;-D ) and where Sati is asleep. Black cat blips itself a lá the déjà vu from Matrix 1 and Sati notices it. Is the cat Neo?

Riding off into the Sunset: Sati makes a sunset "for Neo". Why exactly is she so important to Oracle for? Can't be just the sunset...

Faith & Love: Why is it only now that Faith & Love are truly being addressed? Saying "I believe" and the Architect's mentioning of Neo's love for Trinity in Reloaded don't count- they don't go indepth. And since when do programs "believe" things?

Adam & Eve: Neo & Trinity leave for the city. Architect & Oracle have a final meeting.

"What do you think I am, human?": Architect says this when Oracle asks him about freeing those still plugged in. Oracle has a feeling that we'll see Neo again because she "believes". Again, since when can programs "believe" and what are they believing in? I repeat, is the cat Neo?


Etc...
Neo v Smith: I don't get how the outcome of this rivalry will determine the fate of both worlds. Okay so Smith wants both destroyed (why? Is it his "zoo" remark from Matrix 1 when he voluntarily unplugs himself?) but why a *program* of all things? And a program that's not even that big. It's not the source, and it's not Cypher. Doesn't make much sense. And I still think the Source woulda/shoulda reacted more to the news that it could no longer control Smith and what that might mean. Too brief. WAY too brief. Maybe Trinity's extra-long death ate up too much time?

The Absence of More Good Brawls: Reloaded has the best fight sequences of all the films. Revolutions really only has the whole Niobe/Zion thing to speak for. The final showdown shows 1000s of Agent Smiths watching but not fighting. Yes the midair Kung Fu is cool (and the water blasts) but it's not the Burly Brawl. If the Burly Brawl took place in midair with 1000s of Agents Smiths fighting Neo in the rain (yes they used appropriate thunder/lightning timings in Revolutions) and had Smiths going down and not getting back up and you still ended up in the sewer crater, then I'd be happy. Combine them!

Sagas: Many people are dissatisfied with ROTJ being the end to the Star Wars Saga, but at least there, there was a definate ending to things. Here in the Matrix Saga (I say Saga because the Enter the Matrix Game and Animatrix are supposedly supposed to be part of the story arc, ergo it's not a trilogy per se...and I seem to remember seeing the first movie done as a comic book in part as well) the ending is open. Oracle says she may see Neo again because she believes, and the Architect isn't totally clear that he will or will not free the other plugged-in people. Not a clear ending.

Ah, look at all the lovely people: In Matrix 1 we see a LOT of pluggies (plugged-in people/masses) whom the Agents (lots of them and not just Smith) possess. In Reloaded, we see fewer people, and aside from Smith's infecting of 100 or so, we see Agent Johnson and another possessing only a few. Here, we only see Oracle and Neo being possessed- no other Agents and hardly any other people *at all* whether they're being possessed or not.

Symbolism: Like in the opening of Reloaded, the code turns into something, in this case, a city (COOL SHOT!!!) but then it pulls back, turns into this symbol/shape and starts code scrawling again. Why do I get the feeling that that symbol/shape thingy means something and that some fan somewhere will not only find it but do something with it? Like put it in an updated font or something? Which reminds me, I was gonna go look for that font they use for the title. I already have the one they use for the credits...

Credits: Speaking of credits, what on earth are they singing over the ending credits? Is it Latin? Is it Chinese? What is it and does someone have a translation? There were also fewer "songs" used in this movie for background and nearly all of it was by the same group. It wasn't like the other two which sampled heavy metal from all over the place. And speaking of music, "My Last Breath" by Evanescence was playing in my head from Trinity's death to the beginning of the final showdown. Seemed fitting somehow- even the wording.


OVERALL
The big picture: Completeists/Matrix die-hards will watch the movie, and many people will bitch about it. I've had some bitching to do myself, but I wouldn't say it's a bad movie. I just woulda done it differently. :-) And besides, my reviews are more of observations/opinions than clear-cut "reviews" anyway. :-)

The small screen: I'd buy the DVD and watch it again and again. Please do watch the first two a billion times and the first half of Revolutions (okay, the Battle of Zion and Niobe) a billion times as well. Still, I would not say it's a bad movie, just not Reloaded (and thankfully there's no sexuality in this one!).

Still by all means please do go see it- many times! Just don't you dare get me started on all the Existential 20th Century/failed Eastern Philosophical Redux of the New Testament but in a Computer aspect of things. The Multi-Layered cross-story-etc references/storylines yes. The "religious" part of it: no. Everyone knows I hate it when people try to "redo" the New Testament (Jesus & the Crucifiction) in their own way for entertainment value, and if you didn't already, you do now. Just don't ask me to elaborate. Trust me on this, you don't.

posted @ 10:32 PM  |   0 comments  |